Just an FYI.
I found out last night. He just doesn't have it.
Don't get me wrong, I like George Clooney. He is a very handsome man. I like some of his movies, and some I wonder what he was thinking when he accepted the role. But now I know why he isn't married and doesn't have kids.
He can't kiss.
Here's what happened.
I was in my posh suite at the hotel. I had been laying on the chaise reading, when I decided that I wanted to spend $5 on an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper that came out of the little mini bar in the room. I set my blanket aside, but kept reading as I made my way over to the mini bar. I was reading. I had my head down. I ran smack dab into George Clooney, who had come to his posh suite at the hotel.
I hit the floor with a thud, and being the gentleman that he is he knelt down to make sure I was okay. I'm telling you, that he is a really nice guy. We sat there in the floor trying to figure out how we both were given the same posh suite. I don't remember there being any "spark" between us when we were sitting on the floor together. You know what I mean about the so-called "spark." You see the "spark" between actors/actresses in the movies or on television. I just don't recall feeling that "spark." (I am wondering how many times I can say spark.)
George stood to help me up, but I'm not really sure what happened, because we both ended up back on the floor with him lying right on top of me. There was a bit of an awkward moment. One of my friends, who I was sharing the suite with, happened to walk in right as we landed. I am sure she wondered what the heck was going on, but she never said a word. A surprised sound came out of her, and she turned to leave. Of course, that made George and I laugh a little.
Then it happened! The Spark! It happened!
He leaned down to give me a kiss. Not just a peck mind you, a full-fledged open-mouth french kiss. Yep, me and George Clooney were kissing. The first kiss wasn't great. I kept thinking that maybe, just maybe we were both nervous and tense. So, I had to give him another chance. We kissed again, and again, and again.
That spark, well, it didn't start a fire. It didn't even smolder. It just sparked, and then died. You know, kind of like when you are driving down the road and you see someone throw a cigarette out of their window and it hits the pavement with a spray of sparks. That is how it happened. There was a spray of sparks that glowed for a brief moment, and then they were gone.
He asked me if I had plans that evening, and I told him that I was supposed to go to a show with my friends. He asked if I could get out of it, and spend the evening with him. He said he wanted to take me to his favorite steakhouse, Morton's Steakhouse.
Now, if you know me, then you know that Morton's is my all-time favorite steakhouse. So, I had a decision to make.
I told him to give me a few minutes while I go and talk to my friend. He said he would wait right there. I tried to get up as lady-like as possible. I am not real lady-like though, so I am sure I looked like a dork. But that is when it hit me, this is my perfect opportunity to ditch this guy and I went to whip up a master plan with my friend.
There wasn't really a master plan. I just flat out told her that I had to get George Clooney out of my room. I told her that he just couldn't kiss and for that reason, and that reason alone, I could not spend the rest of the evening with him. She gave me every chance to dump her for the evening and hang out with George, because seriously who wouldn't die to do that? Not me.
So, I walk back to my room trying to come up with a good reason that I can't go eat an amazing steak with him. As I walk back in the door, he is sitting there on the chaise reading my book. I sat next to him, getting ready to break it to him gently, and he kisses me again. I remember thinking, "Give it up George."
And then I woke up.
Apparently, in my mind George Clooney cannot kiss. And that is my story and I'm sticking to it, until he proves me wrong that is. :)
